As a southern belle, I have seen and read Margaret Mitchell’s literary classic, Gone with the Wind more times than I can count. For those of you who have seen it, you will understand this slightly comical realization.
I’m lying wide awake on this RV couch, shivering. (yes you can do that in the south in the summer, but ONLY if someone who you “live” with decides to turn the thermostat to 65) I twist and turn on this mini couch, ignoring the grouchy, annoyed groans I hear whenever it squeaks with my movement. I feel like Scarlett O’hara whenever she finally makes it to Tara. In a desperate state of hunger and exhaustion she drags herself to the garden and digs a carrot out of the dirt. She takes one bite and falls to the ground from stomach pain. With anger, determination and sadness she balls her fist up, angles it to the sky and states, “As God as my witness, I’ll never be hungry again.”
Okay yes, me comparing this moment to that is quite dramatic. I found it more humorous myself…..
If you follow my blog at all, you know I’ve had a tough couple of years…especially the last little bit. So for my mental sanity, I am making a list of things that I look forward to when all the dust settles from this horrendous sandstorm of life.
As God as my witness, these are the desires of my heart to fulfill and do according to his will and foresight.
Ten things I want to do-
1- I’m going to buy an RV and host a charity event. In this charity event, I will invite caregivers for alzheimers, cancer, MS, lupus and various illnesses. I will give them all baseball bats and together we will vent out frustrations and attack the horrible invention that is the RV. Caregivers of sick people rarely get a chance to expel their emotions. This will be a good release for them and plus, I’d just love to see an RV destroyed.
Just kidding, okay no not really….
2- I am going to get a home! Imagining it has kept me sane in my six months of homelessness. My home will be as follows; Living room- Green and forest themed. Bedroom- Teal and Black, ocean themed. Kitchen- Red and jungle themed. Bathroom- Peach colored with coral accents. I will have amazingly fluffy towels in this bathroom that have NOT been dried on a clothesline…. I cannot wait to have a bath tub again. Epsom salt…I miss you!
3- I will attend Physician’s assistant school. I will help the elderly in long term care facilities. I will not talk to the CNA’s, Medtechs and LPN’s like they are stupid, uneducated fools.
4- I will finish my fiction novel. I cannot wait for the world to read what has been in my heart and mind for so long.
5- I will adopt a child. After being homeless, I cannot imagine being a child and feeling the way I’ve felt. It hurt me deeply as an adult. I want to adopt as many as I can. I want to raise awareness so no child has to feel abandoned and hopeless.
6- I will not ever turn my air conditioner on 65 degrees. I never knew you could freeze in a southern climate during summer but it is very possible!
7- I will volunteer to counsel others who have suffered anaphalaxis. That was the most terrifying experience of my life. There are NOT enough resources or awareness about the after effects of anaphalaxis trauma! As a PA, I will do my best to help as many fellow sufferers as I can.
8- I will open my home up to as many people as I can. I want it to be a sanctuary of love, acceptance,healing, comfort and southern hospitality.
9- If my book does well, I want to donate money to help other people. I know so many CNA’s, Medtechs and LPN’s who work for wages at or under the poverty level. If you have a family member in a RidgeCare facility just know that excellent caregiver that goes out of their way for your loved one; works for pennies.
*Hops on soap box* These fast food workers want $15 an hour. Try being a CNA/Medtech/LPN. Work over 40 hours a week.Sometimes 12 hour shifts 6 days a week when staffing is low. Cleaning rooms, doing laundry, passing medications, giving injections, tioleting, cleaning up every body fluid, answering phone calls, consulting Dr’s regarding patients needs just to name SOME of the duties. If anyone deserves $15 an hour it those workers. *Hops off soap box* ANYWAYS…
10- I want to take a deep breath and thank God for getting me out of the storm. I want to relish every moment of peace that I will finally have. I want to encourage others to just hold on.
Cause I guess that’s what I’m still doing…..
I just want my life to count for something. I cannot wait until I can finally say YES! The storm is OVER!
I wanna wrap up in my fluffy towels 🙂
If you’re reading this, please write a response as to what you want to do whenever your storm is over. Even if you’re not in a storm, what are some things you want to do?
If we shoot for nothing, we’ll hit it every time…..
I wanna shoot for peace. Yeah…that sounds like an oxymoron.
Sorry for the over personal blog post. Sometimes I write things simply because I myself need to hear it, see it and talk about it.
I really would love to hear other’s dreams as well.
Feel free to comment.